939028 fine fellows have paid their respects thus far...
Has anyone ever been party to this strange & curious bit of 'advice'? ....When you’re young, you might fancy someone or feel intimidated by someone’s confidence or good looks. So the so called ‘friendly’ advisor says,

 ‘Feel threatened by them? Well, imagine them nude’ or better still, ‘Imagine them on the toilet’ ....

I guess, it’s supposed to strip everyone of their clothes and status, thereby it brings everyone down to a level playing field.

No. It's FUCKED UP ADVICE. That's what it is. Fucked up.

16th Century French philosopher Michael De-Montaigne's credo was; ‘Kings and Philosophers shit. And so do ladies’. Well. That’s fucked up too! because I took that advice/credo/philosophy to my head & heart and now, I can only fancy people who look like they might be able to make a good account of themselves when they’re on the toilet taking a shit.

Posh Spice? She looks like she’d pass the equivalent of weak lentil soup out of her arse.
I used to fancy Britney Spears (low centre of gravity endomorphic physicality a bit like Diego Maradona you’d never get her down) But she lives on a diet of Twinkies, Pepsi & GAK surely she’d have malformed bright orange faecal matter (I don’t know what Twinkies are: Bill Murray mentioned them in Ghostbusters) No. For me, it’d have to be the Domestic Goddess herself Nigella Lawson.

Think about it.....All that rich food and those midnight feasts…go into the toilet after Nigella in the morning, open a window?....No you’d have to knock a fucking wall out! The airborne solids would not only be palpable to the tongue they'd be fucking visible too. As individual a snow flakes but brown not white. Her arse is like some kind of super-massive-black-hole that actually absorbs light....Nigella's Dark Matter.  Sounds like an indie band...
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